Post 1 – why am I doing this?

Shout out to the bitches that have this shit figured out cause I really don’t. And I’m just gonna have to be OK with that right now. So here goes me chatting about the daily funnies, confusions and problems.

I’ve been going back-and-forth on whether or not I wanted to do this blog for about three months. I used to blog for other reasons that I’m not going to talk about, because I don’t want you to know who I am, but I kind of miss it and it was a really great creative outlet for me.

What I’m beginning to realize in my 38 years on this earth (almost 39) is that I know nothing. The minute I feel like I know something, something comes along and promptly proves that I really just know too little about everything! I’m smart in STEM how did this happen?.

Honesty moment: I know a lot about what I do for my work. I have a PhD in my field || Damn should have named this blog Dr. Clueless Blackgirl (too late)|| And to be honest outside of creating a paycheck for me the shit doesn’t matter. I can’t hug it at night or cry on its shoulder. It was a means to an end. This confusion that I will share about, is my lack of knowledge of how to exist and navigate the social landscape of my world. It’s becoming a problem.

Seriously are other adults this confused about everything all the time? BECAUSE I AM!

like:

1. What is up with shoes right now? Are we going to space or preparing for a flood?
2. Should I be investing in stocks, putting things in savings and what the fuck is an NFT and blockchain?
3. Dating. I will talk about dating a lot. I mean a lot men confuse me they’re probably the most confusing thing about my life right now.
4. How do you put the lashes on? Yes fake lashes I like them not the butterfly ones but they’re cute how the fuck do you put them on?
5. When do I know exactly who I am? Or is it always going to be this ongoing amorphous journey of me never knowing what it is I want?

Maybe it’s in my head, and I over think it all, but I’m just gonna take space and time to talk about all of it. Also journaling is really good for your soul. Or so they say, but every time I try to do it on my phone or in a paper journal it just really doesn’t hit that well or I don’t keep up with it. This feels easy like I can get on really quickly write out my thoughts and get on with my day.

But what to talk about is the question or maybe it’s that I just need to talk about whatever I want, whatever comes forward.

~ Dr. Clueless Blackgirl || 🙂I might keep it ||